Let go of anything you can't afford.

Let go of anything you can't afford.

"It's okay to be broke as long as you remain financially responsible." - Reggie Holmes

Malik was in my care almost the entire week, and he's still with me now. Because of that, I couldn't maintain my Uber productivity, so I didn’t make enough to cover my due.

Last Friday, I had $140 in my bank account, and my weekly rate was $314. I thought Malik's birthday party, hosted by his mom, was still happening on Saturday. That same day, I had also agreed to work for a couple referred by a friend. So, my plan was to drive Uber on Saturday to make money for my upcoming due on Monday.

But Malik's mom, Illiana, and her partner changed their weekend plans—going out of town like they usually do almost every other weekend. So, I had to rearrange my plans to make room for Malik in my care. Actually, Saturday is my original day with him anyway. 

Obviously, you can't do Uber while having kids, relatives, or friends with you. But I once had a Lyft driver who had a male friend (or whoever that person was) with her when she picked me up! That was six years ago. It wasn’t supposed to happen, but I got home safe, what interesting!

Anyway, you're not allowed to have anyone with you personally while driving for Lyft or Uber, and it’s also a safety concern for Malik.

I've done Uber Eats, DoorDash, and other delivery & shopping platforms while Malik was in my care, but it was difficult and even stressful for both of us. Malik isn’t an able-bodied kid. I have to take extra steps—getting him out of the car, putting him in a wheelchair-like stroller, and accompanying him to restaurants or customer locations. That’s a lot of work.

For Uber & Lyft, you typically hit $100 in about five hours or after completing ten trips. But with Uber Eats, it takes more than five hours to finally see a $100 balance in your earnings. Trying to hit the target goal of $314 in one day with Uber Eats alone is practically impossible. I had a couple of options—asking for financial help or returning the car for good. So, I returned the car in good faith to Hertz, Uber's rental car provider. Driving for Uber should be enjoyable, not stressful.

I had been driving for Uber & Lyft for five years, and I met lots of interesting people and encountered fantastic and dramatic moments. I loved it! But I know it's not the right fit for my current living situation as a full-time parent with a disabled boy who relies entirely on me for his needs at home.

I would recommend Uber as a side job or even a full-time hustle for single adults with no dependents or anyone who has stable living at home. In my case, I have none of that. If I want to maintain my Uber productivity and achieve successful results, I'd need to rely on Malik’s mom more often, but given the history on her part, relying on her isn't practical.

Even a traditional job isn't the right fit for my current living situation. My last job was at an engineering company, working as a machine shop aide. It was my first job in four years since leaving Goodwill Industries of Southern Arizona.

Being employed at the engineering company, which has contracts with well-known companies like SpaceX and Honeywell, was an honorable moment for me, even though I didn’t earn big money there. Actually, I made more money as an Uber driver than as a machine shop aide.

Why was it an honorable moment? Well, how many Deaf and Black men do you know who work in similar positions at an engineering company? Not many! It’s very rare to see a Black Deaf guy like me working in an engineering company, especially without a formal college degree. It wasn’t an easy job to get hired for, but I did it!

Unfortunately, situations related to Malik’s care, which were beyond my control, affected my work attendance and led to two write-ups for tardiness due to circumstances outside my control.

At that point, I knew I couldn’t continue relying on Malik’s mom. She has the freedom to live how she chooses, but until recently, I learned that I can still control my response to her influence by strengthening my strategy. I don’t always have to rely on outside factors that impact my ability to support myself and Malik independently

Which means I have to give up my employment and even Uber, and put myself back on Social Security Disability. Malik gets his Social Security income as well! Meanwhile, I'm actively working on getting my caregiver documents together through DES so I can get paid for being a caregiver.

Inspired by my lawsuit experience with my former landlord, I signed up for a paralegal studies class online with Ashworth College and completed the course in less than eight weeks. Yes, I know Pima Community College offers those courses, but Ashworth College’s affordable tuition is far superior to Pima CC. I am aware of Ashworth College’s national accreditation status, but I don’t think it really matters in the real world unless you plan to transfer credits to another school to continue your studies.

My next step? Try to get $375 for the NALA national paralegal exam fee.

Of course, Malik and I still need a car, and I hope I’ll be able to buy one as soon as my next tax refund comes in! As for returning to Pima CC for a different program, like legal studies or something similar, that could be the right fit for my current living situation. Hmm, I’m 40, and I’ve been in and out of school for the last two decades, so I’d rather not get into that right now.

My priorities right now are securing a caregiver job, getting a car, and completing the NALA certification exam. These are the goals I’m focusing on.